Happy 1st Birthday

I truly cannot believe one year has come and gone since we met and said goodbye to our sweet baby boy. To have reached the one year mark brings things to a whole new level. When only months have passed, it doesn't feel so far away. But to say "I lost my son a year ago" makes me feel so far away from him. And I don't like that feeling. I miss Brooks more than I can express. His cute little nose and adorable lips. His long legs and big feet:) The peach fuzz on his round head. I'm so thankful I got to spend a wonderful 39 weeks with Brooks Allen Tucker. His short life inside me has changed me. Brooks gave me a new appreciation for pregnancy and life. He helped grow my faith and has made me one proud momma. I often get emails about how Brooks has done the same for others. That is a wonderful gift! I love how God and my son are helping others to hold their babies tighter, be a little more thankful and understand the fullness of God's grace a little better.

Looking back on the year, it's unbelievable what we've gone through. If someone were to look me in the eye and tell me I was going to experience those things again, I would tell them there's no way I'll survive. But you know what, I would. And you know how....GRACE. It is the only way I would and did survive. I feel just like the poem Footprints in the Sand. It talks about how during the trying times of life you look back and only see one set of footprints in the sand. Those are the times God was carrying you instead of walking beside. There is no way to explain how Denny and I have made it to now except to say the Lord has carried us. He has extended much needed grace. He is an amazing God. The Lord has done nothing but take care of us, comfort us and provide us hope through his promises.

Heavenly Father, please give my birthday boy an extra squeeze for me tonight. Let him know that we miss him and love him so much. Tell him how proud I am of him. I wish he was here in our arms, but am grateful You are rocking him instead. Thank you for a great pregnancy and the joy Brooks brought into our lives. Thank you for choosing me to be his mom and for helping me to share his story with others. I love you so much!~Amen